Chapter 18 - MY MOTHER’S CAPACITY
At eighty, Mother began forgetting names more often.
Normal aging?
Maybe.
We checked.
Not because every mistake meant incapacity.
Because she asked.
Neuropsychological evaluation found mild cognitive impairment.
Not dementia.
Decision-making largely intact.
Mother hated the diagnosis.
“I am mildly impaired by everyone.”
Fair.
Then Villa Sereno recommended medication-management assistance.
She consented.
No family member administered.
Professional nurse.
Then the old fear returned.
“If I need more help, will the trust think I’m incompetent?”
“No.”
“How know?”
“Because the protected role already moved when you chose to relocate.”
She relaxed.
The trust no longer gave anyone financial incentive to make her look incapable.
That was brilliant.
Father had separated care from governance eventually.
Then Mother updated healthcare directives.
I became healthcare agent.
My sister? I had no sister. A cousin secondary.
Independent geriatric care manager as advisory.
No Veronica.
Not punishment.
Marriage ended.
Then Mother asked if Veronica could be emergency contact at Villa Sereno.
I was surprised.
“Why?”
“She answers her phone.”
Fair.
We added her as third contact with Veronica’s consent.
No medical authority.
May you like
Just contact.
Boundaries can grow without restoring old roles.
